Modern Polygamists Risk Prosecution, Reveal Family Secrets | Photos - ABC News
Meet the Dargers individually and they might strike you as your average adults and children. But once you get them all together, you realize what makes this family so different from most in America: Joe Darger is a polygamist with three wives -- Alina and identical twins, Vicki and Valerie. Together, they are raising 24 children. Watch the full story on "20/20" Friday at 10 p.m. ET. (Donna Svennevik/ABC News)
I'd understand arguments against it if monogamy worked, but just because we call ourselves a monogamous nation, keep our polyamory behind closed doors, lie and cheat to hide it 'cause it's so heinous that studies exist saying anywhere from 40-80% of people engage in it adulterously, doesn't mean it's not happening. Polyamory doesn't eliminate cheating - some people do it for the thrill of getting away with something and won't be honest about their romantic and sexual liaisons no matter how openly the rest of society engages in them - but it does shift the goal from 'choosing one to love' to 'choosing to love responsibly and without limit'.
Nor does it prevent monogamy. Even where some or all forms of polyamory are legal a majority of people choose monogamy (partly because in most societies in which polyamory is legal, there's a responsibility on the party marrying more than one to be able to contribute to each sub-household at an equal level), and when it's a choice one is far less likely to casually set it aside than when it feels like (or is) a mandate. The lie is the worst part of cheating. Loving more than one person with the consent of others you also love is only a problem when we succumb to jealousy (feeling it is natural, but letting it dictate our actions and reactions is as inappropriate as letting anger or depression or any other emotion with generally negative consequences control us), or when we're disrespectful of one another's feelings. I hope this story is a positive representation.
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